Hope's Elegy

I found that tiny grain of
hope
within and crushed it.
It was too much and not enough.
It was a virus that needed to be
Killed.
Now
Sadness, grief can enter.
For things that were, things that are gone, things that will never be.

And
joy for things to come.

Good things

Great day with family on Cape Cod yesterday - perfect sail and beach day.
Grilled brats for supper - 1st time since living in Iowa.
New featherbed topper.
Wickford art fest today.
Coffee in bed.
Kitty cuddling.
Harry Potter in 5 days.

I love summer.

(Photo courtesy of La.)

Sorry, I'm already married

Rhode Island just legalized civil unions, after failing to get same-sex marriage to a vote.
So, how does this work? We're already married. We have a marriage license from Massachusetts (somewhere-Kath put it in a "safe place" when she moved to Iowa, and we have yet to discover where that "safe place" is). Our marriage is recognized in multiple states.
So, there's no way I'm going to pay more money to the state of Rhode Island to have a second-class title given to our relationship.

Thanks but no thanks.

(Sometimes it's hard to believe that Rhode Island was founded on progressive ideals.)

It's a foregone conclusion

I used to wonder how I will die, or even what the best way to die would be. I've since stopped wondering how I will die. It will be one of two ways - aspiration pneumonia or choking.
I think Katherine has developed PTSD from the number of times that I've choked while eating... not choking as in doing the Heimlich, but choking/coughing requiring water or choking/coughing followed by a piece of food flying out of my mouth and my comment of "oops.. that went down the wrong tube." Every time I cough while eating, she has this look of trepidation as if to ask "Do I need to intervene? Quick... what's the universal sign for choking?" This has kind of become a running joke, except for the fact that Katherine heard about a newlywed couple in which the wife died suddenly from choking on a marshmallow. So, not so funny. That story was awful and sad.
So, last week when Kath was at her conference in New Hampshire and I was home alone, and I swallowed a chip that was apparently the exact diameter of my esophagus and I could feel the peristaltic contractions over and over and over but that chip was not moving, I did panic a bit. But, the good news was that it had gone down the correct tube, so I could breathe, and I just drank a gallon of water and softened that chip up and down the tube it went... after about 15 minutes.
But, I also had an important realization. Not only will I die by choking, but it will be a chip that kills me!

I need more ammo against these chips, because giving them up cold turkey just isn't working, and my chip baby is still hanging on. Maybe this knowledge will convince me to stop eating so many chips.

Hmmm... except for that old adage...
keep your friends close but your enemies closer.

Chips... we're about to get even better acquainted! (I'll tell Katherine I'm eating for my health.)

(PMS) x (PMS)=

Trouble. And conversations like this.

Me:"I overheard that lady say a rubbish truck was on fire."
K: "Maybe that was the burnt rubber smell. Maybe someone put something flammable in the trash."
Me:"That reminds me... we need to get rid of that can of propane. I don't like having it in the house."
K: "We can put it in the garage."
Me: "No, I don't want it in the garage. It's too flammable."
K: "Where do you think people keep it?"
Me: "I don't care. I don't want it around. We don't even use that grill."
K: "What if we have a large cookout?"
Me: "I just don't want a can of propane around. It's dangerous! When have we ever had a large cookout? We would never use that grill anyway."
K: "We would if we had a large cookout."
Me: "We wouldn't use 2 grills if we had a large cookout. Anyway, that other grill is tiny."
K: "Fine. We can get rid of it. What if we needed it for camping? I guess you would say we wouldn't need it."
Me: (Silence)
K: "We'll probably never go camping."
Me: (Silence)

(Picture smoke coming out of the ears of 2 people in the car... like in cartoons.)

And then "I Bust the Windows Out [of] Your Car" came on next on the ipod. Perfectly timed angry breakup song.

Argh. Stupid PMS.
(FYI: We did kiss and make up. We're not still fighting over a silly can of propane.)

Summer lovin'

After a gorgeous 4th of July weekend full of quality time on the beach, reading, sun, sand, swimming, lazy days, good company, laughing, no commitments, no pressures, no stress, no schedules, I feel relaxed. It feels good.

Inanity

I haven't blogged in a while. I find myself dumbstruck by the chaos and sadness and catastrophic events in the world, both manmade and natural. And yet, news reels are focused on inane events, i.e. Charlie Sheen, contestants being kicked off of American Idol, and politicians are flexing their tiny muscles and rather than actually doing something useful, cause the American government to come to a standstill.

Do you ever just want to scream?
Where are our priorities?

When will we live up to our potential as humans?